Chapter 14

It was a routine doctor’s visit. I would be picking Pam up from the Moses House, and bring her to the weekly check-up. Pam’s blood pressure was high and the midwives were concerned. They wanted us to report to the hospital for further testing and a possible admittance. We were both caught a bit off guard; Naomi could come tonight. 

But we do not have the bags! was my first thought, picturing them tucked snuggly beside each of our beds. Then came the, Oh no, Paul has his class tonight. I was standing solo. Then the inevitable, Who’s going to watch our kids? A mother’s mind is never at rest, but this was a little more processing than I could handle at one time. I seriously thought I was going to hyperventilate. Paul assured me that he would cancel class and call Janine to watch the kids. “Is it for certain that she’s having her tonight?” The questions left me perplexed and exasperated.

Is anything for certain? No! Nothing is for certain and everything is up in the air, but we have to prepare for what might be! is what I wanted to scream. Somehow I managed a calm reply – after all, Pam was within earshot. I am sure I was being a bit sensitive given the stress of the situation, but I felt even more out of control than ever before. It all came down to these next few moments, and I was not sure that I could handle it all as gracefully as I had hoped. 

Into the car, across the street, and into the hospital parking lot was the extent of our drive: there in less than three minutes. They checked us in, hooked Pam up, and began to monitor her. We were the only two there, outside of the staff, and it all began to feel a little surreal. After a whirlwind of emotions, there was no sense of urgency about it, and we saw no defined progress. Her blood pressure was high, but her labor was not fully active. The decision would be left to Pam. If she wanted to begin labor, she was full-term, and they could induce. 

As it turned out, our favorite midwife was on the floor for delivery, the high-end luxury delivering room was currently open, and Paul was already in full-swing to the hospital. Everything seemed to be moving us toward induced labor. I knew that Pam would be hesitant, as this move would mean having to make a decision. My opinion did not matter, and would be offensive, seem pushy if anything, and so I kept it quietly to myself, desperately hoping. 

I was really nervous about the whole high blood pressure thing. When we got to the hospital I thought it was going to be just as easy if not easier than when I gave birth to Cassandra. Unfortunately it was NOTHING like that! II was in such an incredible amount of pain and so disappointed each time they would painfully check my progress only to find out that little to no progress was made since last time.